Survey finally establishes who actually fills in surveys


After years of painstaking analysis, market researchers Ipsos MORI have determined the type of person that completes a survey whenever asked to do so.

After buying any item, using any service, visiting any website, going anywhere via any means of transport or actually doing anything at all, everyone is encouraged to ‘evaluate their experience’ via a short survey, which will, honestly, only take up a couple of minutes of your time.  However, despite inducements such as free entry into pretend draws to win fictitious prizes, huge swathes of the general public surprisingly ignore the invitation, correctly surmising that they will be added to a mailing list to get pestered for ever more.

But now Ipsos MORI have been able to identify the kind of gullible idiot who spends their entire life providing feedback and writing reviews so that companies can put little stars and ‘outstanding’ next to their products wherever they are advertised. His name is apparently Derek Jenkins who lives in Basingstoke.

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Posted: Nov 30th, 2017 by

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