Tesla to run Home Office

A member of the media test drives a Tesla Motors Inc. Model S car equipped with Autopilot in Palo Alto, California, U.S., on Wednesday, Oct. 14, 2015. Tesla Motors Inc. will begin rolling out the first version of its highly anticipated "autopilot" features to owners of its all-electric Model S sedan Thursday. Autopilot is a step toward the vision of autonomous or self-driving cars, and includes features like automatic lane changing and the ability of the Model S to parallel park for you. Photographer: David Paul Morris/Bloomberg via Getty Images

In the wake of Amber Rudd’s third apology over the Windrush scandal, civil servants have decided to engage the little known ‘auto-pilot’ option and just allow the department to run itself, whilst Rudd or any new Secretary of State sits in the staff canteen or just generally stays at home.

Tesla is the preferred option on the basis that a department should always be driven by a ‘fully attentive driver’. However, the Foreign Office and DexEU have both managed without a number of times – mostly when Boris Johnson was out jogging or when David Davies wanted both hands free to hold a mirror up so he could better see his own pompous grin.

Tesla would not comment on whether the Palace had any similar contingencies in place and refused to discuss the new Tesla ‘Regency package’, which not only offers the auto-pilot option but zero emissions, high mileage and a driver’s seat which lifts to become your own personal toilet.

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Posted: Apr 29th, 2018 by

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