North Korea and Tesco merge to create Teskorea

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Following the examples set by Iceland and olive oil based lubricant manufacturer, Greece; Teskorea has promised ‘family meals for one’, where every little helps, with the emphasis on the ‘little’.  Recent meetings between the leaders of North and South Korea have paved the way to establish gigastores, frictionless borders and the conversion of nuclear test sites into gender neutral fitting rooms.

 

Missile tests are aimed at reaching the UK and Europe, with strategic product distribution of stale buns, coal and cheap lager.  While Foreign Office diplomats are actively petitioning their North Korean counterparts for ‘significant’ in-store discounts.

Shoppers in the UK will use the Teskorea clubcard as a ‘passport’ for entry into stores where they will find, along with their regular groceries, military hardware bypassing UN sanctions, natural resources aisles, a clothing range by new fashion designer ‘Kimmy’ and 4000 varieties of cheese.

As a result of the merger news, shares in Tesco have rocketed.

 

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Posted: May 5th, 2018 by

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