North Korean Nuclear Test Site Too Unstable for KerPlunk, Say Geologists


Geologists have warned North Korean children not to play KerPlunk on the now defunct nuclear test site. The stress damage caused by previous missile launches is thought to be so extensive that the game now carries the risk of death.

Being more adventurous than their Western counterparts, who play games of chicken on motorways, the children have been tempting fate in more radical ways. Similar advice has been issued towards the dangers of Operation, Dominoes and, the Daddy of them all, Buckeroo.

Lusty Korean lads have also been urged to cease knee trembler, courtship trysts, with equally lascivious lasses. Especially because public sex is punishable by death. Failing that, it is thought that the earth will definitely move at some point.

The increasing instability of the site has cast a huge question mark over Kim Jong-Un and his motives for denuclearisation. Despite his burgeoning bromance with South Korean President, Moon Jae-In, many commentators have cautioned about over-optimism. This includes Elton John who is thought to have informed President Trump, “it`s gonna be a long, long, time before Kim touches down in the USA,” for peace talks. In fact, Kim “is not the man they think he is at home.”


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Posted: May 7th, 2018 by

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