Harry applies to US for green card


A Mr Harry Wales has applied for a green card, which will allow him to live and work in the United States, an immigration officer in New York has revealed.

‘He appears to be qualified,’ the official said. ‘He has an American wife and no criminal record, although we had some issues with his family name. The wife is gainfully employed in some kind of show business enterprise and he is familiar with firearms, so is likely to become a red-blooded American citizen. He himself could perhaps find work as a night-club bouncer, so we would not expect him to become a charge on our generous health and welfare systems.’

The official added that Mr Wales had family connections that involved considerable wealth. ‘Of course, we have to check that there is no RICO element here, but we have seen nothing to suggest that the assets were not amassed in normal capitalistic style.

‘Indeed, it seems that should Mr Wales’s grandmother, father, elder brother, niece and two nephews predecease him suddenly, he would be in receipt of substantial income, all of it taxable to the United States.

‘That would alleviate most of our National Debt.’

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Posted: May 21st, 2018 by

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