Is your name Poppy or Zach? Do you like to play table tennis in your lunch break and whizz around the office on roller skates? Are you hardworking, confident, and middle class? If you answered yah to any of these questions, NewsBiscuit wants to hear from you!
You don’t have to be mad to work here, but a borderline personality disorder would be a definite plus. You must have at least five years experience of saying ‘meta, platform, and solutions’ before or after every god damn word you utter. We are an equal opportunities employer and welcome black and working class applicants. Good luck with that. But more important than a public school education is your personality! You should be wacky, zany, and like, totally bonkers! You won’t be working a boring 9-5 in this office. Oh no. You’ll be doing 8-6. And failure, like wages, is not an option!
We are a young startup based in a plush dockland penthouse. We provide a browser platform-based immersive experience to the satire industry. We urgently require an intern to help us understand what that means.
Benefits of working for us
At NewsBiscuit we like to work hard and play hard. You can eat pastries and fresh fruit for breakfast, then burn it all off on our bouncy castle! Wave your hat in the air (we all wear silly hats in this office!) on a rodeo-horse. Play naked Twister with your co-workers! Enjoy free counselling and trauma therapy.
How to apply
Submit your father’s CV and a covering letter explaining how you’re able to work for nothing. Good luck!