The EU, having strenuously denied for a year and a half that it will never build a border across Ireland, has today been exposed as secretly planning to not do just that.
A spokesman said that the matter of the border remains very controversial. “We are adamant that it is the EU that is refusing to create a border, rather than the UK, however essential a border may be”. He denied having any material plans to not actually build one whilst refusing to build one, at the same time as insisting that the border will become inevitable, whilst not being built at all.
“Its no secret that that we do not have plans to build a border”, he said. “But i cannot comment on whether we have secret plans to not build one or not.”