Rejecting both the so-called ‘Chequers plan’ and Boris Johnson’s ‘Canada plus’, the British public has said the Brexit plan they would most support is ‘Brexy McBrexface’.
Known as BMcB for short, the plan is unfortunately nothing more than a name, to which the public replied that as with Brexit itself, they preferred to vote on an idea so vague it’s practically abstract and let someone else fill in the details later.
Pressed for more details, the public said BMcB might well include free trade with Switzerland “to ensure a consistent supply of Toblerones”, and solving the border issue by converting both Northern Ireland and the Republic to a theme park called World of Leprechauns. Moreover every day will be Friday and the weather will always be sunny.
The government’s Brexit team replied that the name was ridiculous, and should be changed immediately to ‘The Sir David Attenborough Brexit Plan’.
‘Although the contents sound entirely reasonable to us, so we’ll put it to Barnier and see what he says.’