Khashoggi killed himself and was taken away by aliens: official


Saudi Arabia has investigated the mysterious disappearance of Jamal Khashoggi and found that he has died from completely natural causes, according to official spokesman Mohammed Bin Lynr. ‘These were. principally, blood loss, breathing failure and the fact that his heart had ceased to beat. He then proceeded to dismember himself, for reasons unkown despite energetic intervention by members of the staff who endeavoured to persuade him to get a grip and to pull himself together.’

Before they could assist further, the staff were interrupted by the landing of a flying saucer, Bin Lynr continued. ‘A troop of alien beings emerged from the craft, seized the dismembered remains and promptly beamed themselves up again. They had tried to give us some story about wanting his body parts in order to study the anatomy of human beings – as if we are gullible enough to believe some obviously nonsensical made-up rubbish like that.’

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Posted: Oct 19th, 2018 by

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