Upon the discovery that the BBC has been padding out their audiences with paid actors, many theatrical agents are left wondering where their 10% is. With pre-rehearsed lines, fake emotions and scathing reviews – actors could be stealing a role intended for Theresa May.
The average Newsnight guest will now be expected to have done 2-3 years in repertory theatre and a stint as an extra on ‘Hollyoaks’. Experienced Panto actors need not apply, as we already MPs for that.
The BBC admitted that they had compromised their journalistic integrity but had significantly improved their dramatic output. While Emily Maitlis may be discredited as an interviewer, she is now on track for a BAFTA.
One audience member responded: ‘Darling, I’d love to be in your hand picked right-wing audience. Let me just get into role. A Brexiteer you say? What’s my motivation?’