Prime Minister Theresa May today ran into trouble with the process of exiting her car, despite having assured people that it would be a simple process everyone would be happy with.
Finding her own door wouldn’t open, she asked travelling companion Arlene Foster if she’d mind letting her out on her side. Unfortunately, Foster made several unreasonable demands in return for her help, insisting that the car should belong to her from now on, but with Sinn Fein paying for petrol, road tax and insurance.
May then sought help from an EU official standing on the pavement, but he replied that the backstop arrangement whereby he used the door’s exterior handle could only be triggered at a time of the EU’s choosing.
She finally turned to Dave the chauffeur, who said that she couldn’t blame him because it was only his job to driver her to the meeting Mrs Merkel, no to service th car, before adding: ‘Though to be honest, the problem might be some paint got in the locks when my mate Boris was graffiting some random numbers on the side.’