Jacob Rees-Mogg “stockpiling urchins”

oliver-twist

Prominent Brexiteer MP, Jacob Rees-Mogg, has been accused of hypocrisy after it was revealed that he has stockpiled over 100 Cockney urchins.

Mr Rees-Mogg has countered any claims of wrong doing; “Like most people, I need several urchins for my day-to-day life; chimney sweeping, taking messages, buying geese on Christmas day and so on. And urchins do wear out; so it’s commonsense to keep a few dozen in one of the cheaper cottages so they can be slotted into place.”

Mr Rees-Mogg also noted that urchins could be utilised for translating imperial coinage into metric, fetching kindling from Kew Gardens and operating the tiny devices that turn telegrams into the sorcery of email.

 

Hat-tip Squudge

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Posted: Feb 8th, 2019 by

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