The seven Crystal Palace players who have resigned to form a new team to represent South London still haven’t decided on a name. A spokesman for the new team joked that unless the team also came up with a colour for their strip they will have to play their fixture next week against Chelsea naked, which would require a change in Football League rules but could see an increased interest in Match of the Day, with more slo-mo replays and adjustments to corner flag poles. One upside would be the new team would be immune to shirt pulling.
Meanwhile Manager Roy Hodson warned the rebels not to use any confidential team tactics they may have learned at Selhurst Park or any of the songs they learned in the showers. New team names on the table include Bristol Ballast, Pistol Malice, Fistule Alice, Distal Callous and My Lovely Horse