Karen Bradley: ‘I didn’t realise Northern Ireland was in the north of Ireland’


Beleaguered Secretary of State for Northern Ireland Karen Bradley today apologised for misspeaking yet again, explaining she hadn’t realised Northern Ireland was in the northern part of Ireland.

‘If only there was something in the name that made it easy to remember, like Kansas City being the capital of Kansas.’

Speaking at a photo opportunity in Derry, she also apologised for being late, explaining her satnav could only find somewhere called Londonderry, and she wondered if the two places were anywhere near each other?

Once there, she made a conciliatory speech, saying she quite understood how the Irish venerate their hero William Wallace and his great victory over the English at O’Gincourt, celebrated every year on St David’s Day.

Asked about Bloody Sunday, she agreed she also finds it annoying when she’s out of something but the shops are closed.

She concluded she didn’t want to be seen as a partisan or divisive figure, and hoped she had the trust of both the Unionist community who seek a United Ireland, and the Nationalists who see Northern Ireland’s future within the nation of Britain.

Meanwhile, leaked documents show that a planned summit between London and Dublin, intended to settle the sovereignty of Northern Ireland once and for all, was called off at the last minute because both sides feared they might lose, and have to keep it.

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Posted: Mar 8th, 2019 by

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