Mate insisting on referring to basic cookery tips as ‘food hacking’


Your 42 year-old work mate Dave is doggedly sticking to his tendency to call his dietary plan ‘food hacking’ it has emerged.

The news come despite Dave not having any espionage or computer security background which could explain the use of hacking metaphors, and amidst growing evidence that these hacks are essentially basic common sense cookery tips, drawn from the pages of Mrs Beaton.

Dave confirmed the news just today by revealing to you over coffee how he has hacked the cooking of his evening meal by making multiple portions, some of which can be placed in Tupperware and frozen for use in future days.

This audacious heist of accepted cookery wisdom has been accompanied by further risky hacks of convention, involving having a solid breakfast to set him up for the day, and substituting some fruits and nuts in to replace a Mars Bar in his lunchbox.

Details are necessarily sketchy but it is thought, from conversations you’ve had with him next to the water cooler, that Dave is planning a massive ‘life hack’ next, involving going to bed 15 minutes earlier each evening and taking some rubbish in his garden to the local top.

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Posted: Mar 14th, 2019 by

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