Bob the Builder Accused of Making Builders Appear Competent


With Peppa Pig and Fireman Sam embroiled in sexism rows, Bob the Builder has today been accused of showing impressionable children that a construction project can be delivered on time and under budget.

“I had a customer ask why I was 3 months behind schedule on their loft conversion the other day, don’t these people know how these things work?” whined Davie Moore, a builder from Basingstoke. “I haven’t even asked for money yet, no doubt double what they originally thought is going to be a problem.”

“When I was a kid Bob the Builder was capable of fixing anything, I thought life would be that easy when I was older,” claimed Sarah from Basingstoke, who is currently having a loft conversion done. “Davie’s incapable of fixing himself some lunch judging by the fact that he’s constantly eating our food, and I don’t buy that he never flushes the toilet to ‘conserve water’, given he has taken this long I am expecting a discount when it’s finished!”

Piers Morgan suggested things will improve after the UK leaves the EU. “I don’t believe in stereotyping when it comes to things I disagree with like sexism, but I certainly agree with stereotyping those workshy Polish builders. Once we are out good British builders will get the job done in half time and with a much better finish. I watched this documentary the other day about one such builder called Bob who has been doing stunning work in the town of Bobsville!”

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Posted: Mar 20th, 2019 by

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