With Peppa Pig and Fireman Sam embroiled in sexism rows, Bob the Builder has today been accused of showing impressionable children that a construction project can be delivered on time and under budget.
“I had a customer ask why I was 3 months behind schedule on their loft conversion the other day, don’t these people know how these things work?” whined Davie Moore, a builder from Basingstoke. “I haven’t even asked for money yet, no doubt double what they originally thought is going to be a problem.”
“When I was a kid Bob the Builder was capable of fixing anything, I thought life would be that easy when I was older,” claimed Sarah from Basingstoke, who is currently having a loft conversion done. “Davie’s incapable of fixing himself some lunch judging by the fact that he’s constantly eating our food, and I don’t buy that he never flushes the toilet to ‘conserve water’, given he has taken this long I am expecting a discount when it’s finished!”
Piers Morgan suggested things will improve after the UK leaves the EU. “I don’t believe in stereotyping when it comes to things I disagree with like sexism, but I certainly agree with stereotyping those workshy Polish builders. Once we are out good British builders will get the job done in half time and with a much better finish. I watched this documentary the other day about one such builder called Bob who has been doing stunning work in the town of Bobsville!”