A Man has spent his entire life believing that the yellow fuel warning light in his car is just a suggestion he might want to put some fuel in at some point, you know, whenever.
43-year-old human sloth, Mike Smith said, “when it comes on, I think maybe at some point this year me, or somebody else should consider going to a garage to put fuel in. No hurry. Funnily enough, after a while it normally goes away.”
“It’s like the tyres. Some bloke at work couldn’t believe I’ve never changed the tyres on my car. He said, ‘without tread they’re illegal.’ What is he on about? Slick tyres stick to the road better – has he never seen Formula 1?”
“Honestly, what’s with all this stress? One minute a bin is full and the next it’s empty. Dirty clothes get thrown in the washing basket and then clean ones appear in your drawer. That’s how the world works. People should just chill out.”
Mike’s wife, Sarah was unavailable for comment. She was last seen walking along a dual carriageway carrying a petrol and pushing a double-buggy.”
“Mind you, I’m not happy that my tea’s late tonight,” said Mike