ITV are under pressure to bring the tabloid talk-show host back for a one off episode, featuring Jeremy Kyle interviewing Jeremy Kyle. Having had his show cancelled due to the suicide of one of his guests, viewers are interested to see if he can work his ‘magic’ on himself.
In the TV special, Mr. Kyle will have his relationship and dependency issues aired for all to see; followed by the obligatory soul-searching, tears and punch-up in the car park with a girl called ‘Chantelle’. A lie-detector will then be combined with electrodes and attached to Mr. Kyle’s genitals; not to find out the ‘truth’ but simply because he ‘likes it like that’.
Critics have accused the show of human bear-baiting and poverty porn – the only kind of porn where everyone gets f$cked. Said one guest: ‘I was treated like human excrement, exploited in the worst ways imaginable and all I got was a bucket of Chicken McNuggets – which according to my DNA test, turns out to be my son’.
In the ultimate act of depravity, Mr. Kyle – gorge rising – will be forced to apply his own false mateyness to himself. ITV insisted that a welfare team, including a consultant psychotherapist and three mental health nurses, will be on hand – but mainly for the audience
hattip to Sinnick