After a weekend of sporting success and too much alcohol, UK voters are now convinced that everything will be fine – mainly because we can catch. Off the back of this euphoria, no task is too hard, provided Ben Stoakes is allowed to hit it with a plank of wood.
Jacob Rees Mogg was quick to tweet that England’s cricket World Cup win was down to being outside the EU – and not because half of the team were born outside of the UK. It was clear that convoluted trade agreements could be resolved by Googlies, Inswingers and judicious Sledging.
Said one nervous cricketer: ‘I’ve been put in charge of preferential duties and quotas for mutually recognising the EU conformity assessment procedures…um…what’s that? Can’t I just hit it for six?’
For those critical that sport will oversimplify discussions, clearly has never heard of the LBW rule. Explained a Sports Minister: ‘We are appointing Lewis Hamilton to negotiate our post-Brexit car manufacturing industry – it’s just a shame we won’t have one’.