JFK “was actually bemoaning difficulty of booking local restaurant”

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Startling new documents, released by US federal records office today, reveal that John F. Kennedy’s famous “Moon” speech to Rice University in 1962 may have caused the greatest misunderstanding in recorded history.

“We choose to go to the moon,” JFK famously stated, “and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard” and hard indeed they were! It now appears that the President had made no less than 17 phone calls to local restaurant “The Orange Moon” in the three days preceding his speech, determined to take his entourage to their famous karaoke and ribs night that Friday.

“In retrospect, there is clearly a whole heap of sarcasm in ‘We choose to go to the moon in this decade'” commented Whitehouse historian Bob Cramer. “The records now show that this was JFK’s third visit to Houston in a 6-month period and it looks like he was unsuccessful in booking his favoured karaoke night every time. Still, I guess the President’s loss was humanity’s gain if the result was the NASA Apollo programme and everything that has resulted from that.”

Today’s revelations have caused historians to wonder what other political misunderstandings might have had such a dramatic impact on human history with significant time being spent looking for boxing venues called “The Beaches” or “Turning” station on the Brighton line. On a less academic note, however, it’s looking like a good Halloween for Sam Rogers; landlord of the “Do or Die”.

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Posted: Jul 19th, 2019 by

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