With up to 150,000 Thomas Cook customers in danger of being stranded abroad, Tory MP, patriot and avid collector of beer mats, Mark Francois has called for a revival of the Dunkirk spirit.
Fresh back from his trip to Holland where strapped to a young paratrooper, François was hurled screaming from a rebuilt Lancaster bomber, luckily landing on his head, Mark has confirmed that he and the paratrooper swopped numbers and expect to be seeing a lot of each other over the coming weeks.
The squat, clinically insane, ERG bully boy demanded the release of the Britons who the foreigners intend to hold hostage unless Thomas Cook or the British Government can come up with the ransom money.
Speaking exclusively to Go Commando magazine, François put out a rallying cry to his fellow lunatics, mobilize , rev up your transits ,steal a double Decker bus, your country needs you.
Worried that the Brits abroad would be running out of lager and fags, Jacob Rees Mogg’s lackey intends mounting a daring midnight raid to steal a Euro Star train and to re-enact his second most favourite film, Von Ryan’s express and to thunder through the night on his sacred rescue mission.
Asked how many people he had managed to recruit so far,Mr Francois, said five for definite but that Chalkie is a possible if Westham are losing and he leaves the game early.