Primark warned Chris Grayling not to buy ferries online

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Matters came to a head in December 2018 when an internal DoT audit discovered millions of pounds of public funds were being squandered on Primark deck shoes, sailor shirts, hats, sunglasses, and ferries from third-Party vendors. A Dept of Transport insider explained: ‘Every day Chris’s office door would be locked for a couple of hours.’

‘Moments later you’d detect the sweet acridity of a Ylang Ylang and Butterscotch Yankee Candle filling the air, complimented by the muffled harmonies of Christina Aguilera, and you knew we’d all be getting overpriced pastel polo shirts by the end of the week.’

Executives from over-budget project HS2, confirmed speculation that the choice of the first phase of the high-speed rail link to Birmingham, was indeed ‘no coincidence’.

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Posted: Oct 17th, 2019 by

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