Government poised to name names

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With the Government convinced of victory at the General Election, Dominic Cummings is putting his plan in place for the UK to crash out of the EU without a deal in December 2020.

As the United Kingdom is now a laughing stock, the cabinet have been considering changing the name of the country from the United Kingdom, to something new and exciting, a fresh start for 2021.

Apparently the name, Not Europe was discounted, with many in Downing Street preferring the name England. Supporters of the name England have pointed out that it would finally put to bed the myth that Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland were proper countries and also put a stop to the idea that Westminster only cares about England.

Opponents of the name England point out that this would do nothing to stop the jokes that are told at every UN summit by foreign leaders, well know phrases and sayings which are changed to give people a laugh.
Mr Macrons, Mad dogs and English men believe a word Boris Johnson says and Trumps, An Englishman’s home will eventually be repossessed, had world leaders in hysterics as the champers started to flow.

With a decision still pending, the idea of a national competition has been suggested but officials were quick to point out that should this happen, no names containing the words, Boaty, Mcboat or Face will be considered.
They also refused to confirm or deny that the cast of Love Island would be asked to launch the new name.

Having had unofficial negative feedback from Buckingham Palace about the wisdom of a name change, Mr Johnson is believed to have replied to her majesty in a letter addressed to The House of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha.

According to reports, the Queen was not amused.

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Posted: Nov 15th, 2019 by

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