Ian Duncan Smith challenges Foodbank to an eating contest

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Duncan Smith insists that to get to his level of gluttony has taken years of hard work.  Early morning starts ,polishing off, 15 weetabix, 3 bowls of porridge and a double full English before being pushed in a wheelbarrow to Westminster to submit ones expenses takes a lot of effort.

Duncan Smith, who competes in food challenges under the nickname ‘Slaphead’, described himself in who’s who, as an eating machine that dabbles in politics.  Still in full on eating mode and attempting to lick the plates of his table companions, Duncan Smith pointed to his custom made trousers, elasticated waist, extra large seat and wipe clean front; ‘…these bad boys have helped me meet so many challenges and were worth every penny of tax payers money that I spent on them’.

‘This Labour plan is outrageous; we should be feeding their souls, not their stomachs.  If we take this to its logical conclusion, the next thing we know, little snotty faced urchins will be expecting the state to pay for their second homes, a retinue of full time staff and for their moats to be repaired.’

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Posted: Dec 7th, 2019 by

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