Despite thousands of heterosexual couples in England and Wales entering into civil partnerships, a far greater number will be moving to a state of awkward silence and passive aggressive comments about the ‘state of the bins’. While a civil partnership can last the duration of your married life, an ‘uncivil’ one will feel like ten times longer.
The first uncivil partnership was pioneered in San Francisco in the 1970s, when equal rights activists realised that gay couples were just as miserable as straight ones. Under uncivil laws, partners are entitled to the same arguments about tax and inheritance as everyone else.
The key to making an uncivil partnership work is to spend too much time together. The Supreme Court ruled that all couples were entitled to sleep in separate rooms, despise their in-laws and make snide comments about their partner’s choice of friends.
One human rights lawyer explained: ‘Same-sex couples deserve equal protection, provided the sex is exactly the same: of poor quality and concluded with both participants rolling way with bitterness and regret’.