Prince Harry and Meghan to live like bears in the woods

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Following their frightful decision to step back as senior members of the British royal family, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex have announced that they will be moving to Canada where it is understood they will live among bears in some densely-forested wilderness and survive mainly on fish found in rivers.

One royal correspondent for the BBC, Nicholas Witchell, explained: “Clearly it’s early days, so all we can say for certain is that Harry will stand partially upright in the bitterly-cold, fast-flowing waters and swipe the passing salmon out onto the river bank so that Meghan can punch them in the head and feed them to baby Archie.”

“However, while living like bears in the woods may well offer these progressive young royals many new and exciting opportunities, no doubt their greatest challenge will be finding a suitable place in which to shit.”

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Posted: Jan 13th, 2020 by

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