Rock star died ‘choking on someone else’s vomit’


Singer songwriter and lead guitarist Ricky Smythe ‘died of misadventure after choking on someone else’s vomit’ a coroner’s court concluded.  In a case which makes medical history, the Coroner, Michael Smithson said: ‘Choking on one’s own vomit is, in many ways an occupational hazard in the rock world.  But choking on another’s vomit takes guts.’

Police issued an appeal to try and identify the mystery sick and its owner, to establish what happened.  ‘This was one of the most unpleasant crime scenes we have had to deal with, and two of my officer colleagues have complained of worsening eyesight, having been put off carrots for life,’ said DCI Ronald Jones.  ‘It is thanks to the dedication of my team that the truth emerged. DNA testing revealed the puke could not have been brought up by the deceased, a fact he brought up in his report.  Hence the enquiry.  And how I love using the word ‘Hence’’

DCI Jones continued: ‘We are still trying to match the offending barf to other samples on our database, so far with no luck.  But we want to ask the public if they know anyone who ate a Mars Bar, a smoked mackerel, bananas and custard, a meat pie, kippers and a Cadbury’s crème egg and an extra hot Peparami (a bit of an animal) in the Chiswick area on 22nd November 2019 at around 11.30pm . It’s a very specific description, so that person will know who he or she is. We ask them to come forward.  If you did consume all those items in CHiswick and don’t know Mr Smythe, we still ask you to come forward and eliminate yourself and the smoked mackerel etc from our enquiries.  Oh yes and diced carrots.’

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Posted: Jan 24th, 2020 by

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