Remainers spotted entering ark two-by-two

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Wide spread flooding throughout the UK, has led to Londoners and people wearing blue face-paint boarding a wooden vessel, 300 cubits long and sailing under an EU flag. Storm Dennis is thought to be a sign from God, or Michel Barnier as he is known.

Remainers had attempted to warn people about the coming deluge of deregulation and border checks, but they were ignored by the Brexiteers of ‘Sod’em & Go-more-yeah’. No actual animals will be permitted on the vessel, as they are no longer eligible for a pet passport.

The Ark itself meets EU health and safety standards, made by Huf Haus. Meanwhile the Biblical flooding will cleanse the North of England of Brexit voters and stodgy puddings.

A dove bearing a lovely bowl of olives ‘and a cheeky cocktail’ will signify when the flooding has ending. Those that survive will then repopulate the UK, as the only way to get more than 48%.

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Posted: Feb 19th, 2020 by

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