London Pickpockets face a bleak fututre


With so few people out on the main streets of London the downturn in the capital’s valuables removal work is reaching crisis point.

An industry spokesman who just wanted to be identified as “Fingers” pleaded for help from the Government. “We’ve been a feature of the likes of Oxford Street for generations like, just tryin’ to make an honest livin’ but ain’t worth it no more, innit Guv.”

“If fings don’t get any better, we’ll ‘ave to start pickin’ on ourselves – an’ then we’ll be in a fine mess after it all ends – make no mistake”

Fingers cut a forlorn figure as he shuffled away from our correspondent who went to note the time of the conversation, only to discover his watch was missing, as was his wallet and new iPhone.



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Posted: Mar 30th, 2020 by

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