Fears ironing may fold

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UK ironing figures have fallen for the third week in a row, to reach an all time low of just 3.2%. With the majority of the country’s workforce now confined to their homes, pride in personal appearance has nosedived.

Video conferencing in particular has led to a 50% drop in demand for ironing, as few aim their webcams below the waistline – and of those that do – a large proportion have no call for neatly pressed trousers and skirts, when appearing on their own ‘special interest’ channels.

Speaking from their headquarters in Corby, Ironing Board Chairman, Ben Folds, issued this starch warning : “This marked decrease in de-creasing could lead to ironing in the UK being completely crushed.”

During a recent press industry press conference Mr Folds was pressed to press the Government to address the pressing need for pressing.

“There is a real frustration at the Government’s total lack of action. No 10 need to step up to the crease and strike while the iron is hot – not crumple and fold at the first signs of pressure. Ironing in the UK has been flat for some time and my members were quite rightly letting off steam,” Mr Folds explained.

The Government have previously issued advice to the public to purchase stay press trousers and non-iron shirts. However, the Ironing Board maintain that relying on artificially creased clothing will not iron out the wrinkles and could even exacerbate the current situation.

“If the Great British public were to simply resort to non-iron clothing, it would be a con-pleat disaster,” concluded Mr Folds.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2020 by

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