“US death count much lower than all these countries I just made up” claims Trump

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Donald Trump has claimed that, as well as being lower than the real death count from coronavirus in China, the US toll is also lower than a host of other countries that he just made up.

“Thirty six thousand. That’s our number. And China claim under five thousand. Do you know their real number? A Gajillion. A Gajillion coronavirus deaths in China.” claimed the President, standing in front of a chart with ‘John Hopkiss University’ written on it in crayon.

“A Gajillion. Think about that. That’s a number. A real number. A big, very big number. And we’re only in thousands. We’re doing great. Thanks entirely to me.”

Trump went on to list other countries that have worse death counts than the USA, some from popular fiction and some that he appears to have completely made up on the spot.

“Wakanda have been hit bad, real bad. They have over a million. Not great health care there, not great. Narnia. Half a million in Narnia. Fawns seem to be particularly susceptible.”

“Belgerland has it bad too. They didn’t act fast like I did with my great travel ban. Really great travel ban. They have three hundred thousand. We’re doing just great, we have it completely under control. And anywhere we don’t is somebody else’s fault. Governors, WHO, Nancy Pelosi, that guy over there. Everybody but me.”

Trump also revealed that he is going to personally do more to tackle the virus by calling it names on twitter and has already come up with “Creepy Covid” as a start.

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Posted: Apr 20th, 2020 by

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