The government’s new message of “Stay Alert” is unclear and unhelpful, complained a man who has ignored all the previous advice anyway. “What does it even mean? I can go outside as much as I like now but I have to treat people with suspicion?”, [read...]
Prime Minister Boris Johnson has been announced as the new host of the classic ITV gameshow 3-2-1, after wowing producers with his audition tape on Sunday evening. ‘We were thinking of Alan Carr or Stephen Mulhern to front it’, [read...]
Scientists in Oxford have observed that following Boris Johnson’s speech to the nation on Sunday evening, the Coronavirus now seems to be unsure what to do this week. ‘It’s bizarre, it is suddenly exhibiting a state of confusion” said Professor Philips of Oxford University’s Jenner Institute, [read...]
