Charlotte’s Webchat with the Top Half of Grandma’s Face
Alice’s Adventures in Blunderland, Misquotes and Doctored Statistics
Anne of Green Tonsils
Charlie and the Great Glass Box Around his Local Town Statue (bit more BLM, that one)
James and the Giant Bottle of Peach-Scented Hand Sanitiser
Peter Pan-demic
Pippi Longstocking, Apron, Face Mask, Visor and Gloves
Five Go Mad with Cabin Fever / Five Thousand go Mad in Primark, etc
The Hobbit: There and Back Again becomes Dominic Cummings: Durham and Back Again
The Secret Garden Lockdown-Defying Barbecue
Five Children and It’s All Driving Mummy Mad
The Borrowers of Everything We Couldn’t Find in Sainsbury’s
Flat Stanley can Finally Bubble with Maisonette Graham
Stig of the Dumped Substandard Turkish Ventilators
War Hoarse and Suspicious Cough
The Velveteen Andrex (is back in stock at Tesco’s)
Wind in the PM’s Billowing locks / Spin-ing the PM’s Peccadilloes
The Empty Loo Roll Holder at Pooh Corner (because, getting to Asda first…)
The Liar, the Hoarding Bitch, and the Wardrobe full of Loo Rolls
Winnie the Putin and the Bodies Buried in Hundred Acre Wood
When we were Very Young Mummy Drank a Lot of Home-School Gin
The Tale of Petering out Rabid Response Testing Kits
The Bungle Book of Govt ‘Guidance’ (featuring Moangli, Hullabaloo, Shere Kharnage & ’king Screwy)
A Tinkle in Time only if the Public Loos Reopen
Green Legs and Hands: New Symptoms Confirmed
The Adventures of Chucklescary Spin
Swallows- and Amagonnas
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Lay-offs
Swallows and Amazon’s Deliveries
The Tiger Who Came to Tea and Shat Everywhere
The Adventures of Tom’s Lawyer
Little Red Riding Hoodie
The Railway Children Nicked for Trespassing
Thomas the Wank Engine
The Never Ending Tory
Treasury Island
The Bi-Polar Express
The Liar, The Ditch and the Unkempt Wardrobe
Windrush in the Willows
Contributors: Filthy Rich, SteveB, oshaughnessy
Hat tip to ron cawleyoni.