Hancock orders the body of Richard 3rd to be tested for Covid 19

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Matt Hancock has asked that the body of King Richard 3rd, currently buried in Leicester Cathedral, be urgently tested for Covid 19.

At a private press conference, the Health Secretary announced, ‘I am giving the order now for King Richard 3rd’s body to be urgently tested for the Coronavirus. I am doing this not just because there are increasing numbers of infections in Leicester but because we know from experience that as a hunched, incompetent, leader of a bitterly divided country he is a prime candidate to catch a severe case of the disease’.

Hancock went on, ‘The good thing about Richard is that, since the lockdown has been ordered he can be trusted not to immediately wonder round hospitals in Leicester shaking hands with everyone.’

Journalists asked whether it may also be worth testing the late King’s descendants for the virus, to which Hancock replied ‘unfortunately, experience here also shows that the exact number of known offspring may be difficult to calculate.’

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Posted: Jul 3rd, 2020 by

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