Aesop’s children thought he was ‘a bit of a dick’


Aesop’s family have disowned him after what they describe as ‘years of mental abuse’.

Aesop’s daughter explained ‘Every bloody day was the same. You’d ask Dad for pocket money and he’d answer you with a story about a giraffe and a pig, or a lost frog, or something.

‘If Mum asked him when he was going to paint the fence he’d come out with some crap about a tortoise beating a hare in a race. That’s a tortoise beating a hare. Garbage. None of the stories made much sense. God, he was a prat.’

Aesop’s son added ‘It was always animals. My first driving lesson, I just wanted to know about the clutch and how to change gears, so naturally he told me a story about a fish and a monkey instead. When I eventually got going we came to a roundabout and he just said ‘See? The butterfly’s wings are strong and beautiful’ while I crashed into an articulated lorry. Lost the sight in my left eye.’

Aesop argued in his defence: ‘You can’t see the peacock’s tail at night.’


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Posted: Jul 10th, 2020 by

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