Man ignores garden for 3 days, discovers primitive tribe living in shrubbery

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Hacking his way towards the shed with a makeshift breadknife machete, Sam Jenson was astonished to stumble across a medium-sized village amongst the verdant undergrowth, occupied by the m’Photeh tribespeople.  ‘I don’t know who was the most surprised,’ reported Sam.  ‘But once we sorted it out and the lads put down their assegai throwing spears, turns out they’re really nice.’

‘Do I need to do anything- you know, officially- like report them?  I can’t remember if we’ve officially Brexit-ed or not, and what difference it makes.  They seemed chilled, so I settled for asking them a couple of questions from the Citizenship Test webpage.  They knew all about the Magna Carta, which is more than I did, and said they’d met Rory Stewart several times, so I left them to it.’

‘Reckon they should be settling down to a nice tenderloin of next door’s cat about now.’

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Posted: Aug 10th, 2020 by

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