New X-men character revealed: the mutant Algo Rhythm

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Standing in for the suddenly incapacitated Professor Charles Xavier, Prime Minister Boris Johnson took the opportunity whilst addressing a school for not very gifted youngsters in Leicester to reveal the latest admission to the X Men academy. Joining the ranks of Wolverine, Storm, Mystique and the Beast is the latest mutant ‘Algo Rhythm’

Blessed with an ability to jumble up predicted numbers so that they no longer have any value or statistical significance, the first glimpses of Algo Rhythm’s powers were seen in schools across the country, when he was seen to render the mighty power of Ofqual completely redundant, reducing thousands of teenagers to tears in the process.

Quite what mayhem Algo Rhythm will get up to in the next few months is uncertain but it is highly probable that he will be blamed for a failed track and trace system, a second spike in Covid 19 infections and a no deal Brexit. Our only hope lies with the government’s super hero, ‘Demonic Cummins’ a being blessed with super powered eyesight and teflon like skin to make any kind of shit just fall off him.

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Posted: Aug 27th, 2020 by

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