Matt Hancock to promote Track & Trace through Friends Reunited


The Health Secretary confirmed that social media influencers were employed to endorse the Government’s virus strategy – normally promoted through Pokémon GO. Mr. Hancock said they would be using cutting edge technology, such as MySpace, Windows Vista and his own Instagram account – which has upwards of 13 followers.

The extensive track and trace within Friends Reunited will not tell you who has Covid-19, but it will tell you if your ex-girlfriend is still living in Slough. A spokeswoman for Mr. Hancock said: ‘There was some talk of an App with the Grim Reaper counting down time until the virus gets you, but apparently the name Tik-Tok was already being used.’

Friends Reunited is the perfect option, as it will allow the Health Department to trace all of your classmates from 1983. True, in 2008 the site lost 47% of its users, but Mr. Hancock insisted it was still a great match-up, as he planned to lose 47% of the UK population to coronavirus.

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Posted: Sep 2nd, 2020 by

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