Estate agents are reporting a surge in property sales as millions of parents take advantage of their children being out of the house for the first time in months to secretly move house. Jessica and Clive Walters of Kingston are typical of the trend.
‘Young Jemima and Piers are utter, er, quite high-spirited and creative young scamps,’ said Jessica. ‘Home teaching has been a slight challenge, but it went a bit more smoothly when I introduced the children to white wine. When it was announced that they would be returning to school, we started putting the wheels in motion. I took a good swig of gin or ‘home teaching fuel’ as I call it, and called the estate agents in Orkney and Shetland. Yes, it is quite a long way. It’s a very long way.’