Following the death of some “sharp-tongued old hag” who did some stuff for women and rattled on for years about gender equality, the President has moved quickly to appoint a far less annoying but substantially more glamorous successor.
Mr Trump announced the news in a White House press briefing.
‘Who needs a hatchet-faced witch ruling the legal roost and telling the President of the USA that he’s a ‘faker’. She wanted me to hand over my tax returns and said there’s more chance of finding intelligent life in the acid clouds of Venus, than in the White House.
The gun-slinging folks of the USA need more curves in the Supreme Court. They want a sex robot who will say ‘Yes Donald, No Donald’ in a variety of flexible positions. As a professional adult actress, I’ve every confidence that Ms Daniels, who has signed numerous non-disclosure agreements, will fit the bill perfectly.
It’s also unlikely that she’ll ever question my executive decision to bury a crazy old bat under several tons of concrete on the Mexican border, which, they tell me will tremendously reduce the risk of any grave spinning activity.’