After Pfizer and some other disreputable ISIS run Biotech Vaxx killer corporation announced their useless vaccines, the world-renowned Trump Labs have blown them both out the water.
CEO Trump says the other vaccines aren’t even ready yet, have to be frozen in the ice clouds of Venus, only work 90 to 95% of the time and probably not even while people are asleep.
He says he’s devoted hours to the development of the Bigly, usually somewhere between the 8th and ninth holes of his Florida golf course.
‘It’s a terrific vaccine. Nothing has been more terrific. We know how Pfizer and the other companies are producing their vaccines. We investigated. A terrific investigation. We found they’re using stolen hybrid lizard-human brain cells, monkey organs and Bill Gates’ pubic hairs.
The Bigly vaccine has been through all the tests. So many terrific tests. We’ve had people testing the tests, and it’s gone through phase eleven trials which involves injecting a family of heavily armed mid-west hillbillies in their genitals. After twenty minutes, no-one had been infected with covid. That means the Bigly is good for stopping every virus on the planet 100.5%.’
The Bigly vaccine will be widely available in grocers across the USA from tomorrow at a special introductory price of $499.99 a dose. For storage purposes, the stores will need to have a deep geological repository for any leftover uranium.