The UK Government has confirmed that the EU Trade Deal will allow children to fish using tiny nets on bamboo poles whilst on holiday at the seaside. There was much discussion about this and it was seen as a major sticking point during discussions.’How could one differentiate between a British and a EU starfish or crab?’ asked Sir David Frost, rhetorically.
The agreement on Rock Pool Fishing (pages 748-771) means that British children on holiday in the EU can catch one crab or one dead starfish, up to three straggly bits of seaweed and up to six different types of shell. These will have to fit in a regular sized (600ml) bucket or one jam jar if the creatures are still living. Taking them home will be allowed, dependent on how bad they stink up Daddy’s car.
However, there will be no limits on foreign children fishing our British rock pools using their industrial-style methods. This has angered Shadow Home Secretary Nick Thomas-Symonds, who is concerned that foreign children will have decimated our UK hermit crab and colourful seaweed stocks by the end of 2024. Labour have suggested EU visitors may come just to take advantage of our coastal flora and fauna. Ursula von der Leyen denied this, but remember that she is a foreigner and would say that.