Rapturous fishermen sell up and move into lucrative nativity trails business

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The UK’s proud fishing industry has today expressed universal thanks to Fisheries Minister, Victoria Prentis, for paving the way for them to access the highly profitable Yuletide market.

“We’re swapping seas for seasonal commerce and couldn’t be happier,” said a jubilant Cornish trawlerman, “and it’s all thanks to Prentis, working hard in our interest to secure our future in nativity trails while every waste-of-space MP was pissing about trying to read the Brexit Deal.”

Prime Minister Boris Johnson has rewarded Prentis for the breakthrough with an offer of promotion to leadership of the proposed Ministry for Nativity Trails, in charge of what will be the largest budget in the Government’s portfolio.

“Well, it’s nice to be appreciated, but I’m not sure I can accept” said Prentis, “I’ve got so much responsibility already as chair of the Select Committee for Fiddling While Rome Burns, not to mention my work in the All-Party Parliamentary Group for Ascertaining How Many Angels Can Dance on the Head of a Pin.”

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Posted: Jan 17th, 2021 by

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