A spokesman for the Royal Family has confirmed that one-time royal, ginger sheep of the family and husband punching well above his weight, Prince Harry, has still not turned in his Royal Lanyard and ID card.
“I’m sure that this is an oversight on his part, he told our reporter, “but we know that it has been used recently at Swans R Us, World of Venison and that it is racking up Royal Yacht Miles at an alarming rate.”
Allegra Fortescue-Smythe, speaking on behalf of the couple, said, “These allegations are totally untrue. Since giving up the royal life, Harry, his wife Meghan and their son, Archie Andrews Mountbatten-Windsor, have been living as normal people in Hanna Barbera, California. They fit right in and do just what the normal, everyday Californians do; entertaining celebrities, having plastic surgery, not paying taxes, and saying “and shit” at the end of every sentence.”