The AstraZeneca virus is being withdrawn, according to internal sources, because the rapid speed of development and roll-out led to them accidentally forgetting to put the autism in.
“Normally, a good 60-70% of our development time is spent thinking up new ways to autisise the subject”, a technical source within the organization told us, “but this time, due to the rush, we simply forgot all about it.”
A frantic recall has been issued for current unused stocks of the vaccine. However, the company is optimistic that they may still be able to offer autism to those who have already taken the vaccine using an over-the-air software update via the 5G tracking chips.
