Estate agents in Barnsley have reported exceptional demand following news that Barnsley is actually wealthier than nearby Richmondshire. The poor folk of lowly Richmondshire will finally benefit from some Government support thanks to local MP Rishi Sunak.
‘It’s long overdue,’ said an estate agent in Brough-with-St-Giles. ‘People around here are living in the Middle Ages. They still have horses, for God’s sake! They have to hunt down foxes on horseback just to protect their livestock. Go to Barnsley and literally nobody’s reduced to horse transport – even the poorest folk there can afford a bus pass, with plenty of people driving cars of some description. They’re all retired from the mining industry, with plenty of time on their hands.’
The desperate people in Richmondshire are counting their blessings that they elected Rishi Sunak as their MP. ‘He’s really come through for his people,’ said one resident. ‘I was down to my last gymkhana.’