The UK government has passed an Act declaring that April Fools’ Day is to be made illegal throughout Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Anyone caught breaking the law will be fined 20,000 Bitcoins, and could face up to 400 years in a care home.
Police forces across the nation have been ordered to crack down as hard as possible on anyone they suspect might be planning an ‘AFD act of terrorism’. To that end, accompanying laws have been repealed prohibiting excessive use of police sarcasm.
Some have suggested that the underlying motive for the Act being rushed through at the last minute is due to a sudden realisation from department ministers that despicable things they’ve been doing to civil servants throughout the last year might lead to ‘vengeful urges’.
But the real reason is that the prime minister and his cabinet have slumped into a terrible depression through coming across as complete and utter fools all of the time. To that end, the Act will be extended beyond April 1st and run throughout the year, every year, in an effort to counter anyone suggesting that they are fools in any way. That, rather than making any miniscule attempt to not constantly say or do foolish shit.