Nation mourns loss of TV scheduling


As 24/7 courage of the death of Prince Philip hits our screens, thousands of people lined the streets because there was nothing better on TV. Tears were shed as gameshows and crime dramas were cancelled, while ironically Netflix reported a 57% increase in people watching The Crown.

Said one mourner: ‘It hit me, right in the middle of my Friday night TV. One second Ant & Dec were there and the next they were gone. It just makes you realize how fragile programme scheduling is’.

Antenna were held at half mast and all TVs were put on standby to avoid the simpering face of Nicholas Witchell. The Last Post was played, alongside the theme tune to EastEnders. While, out of respect, families restrained the urge to put on a DVD, for at least 3 minutes.

Asked whether Prince Philip would have wanted to disrupt the TV scheduling and be an absolute nuisance, a Palace Official confirmed: ‘It’s exactly what he would have wanted’.

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Posted: Apr 12th, 2021 by

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