The southern tribes still mourning the death of Prince Philip

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Tribal communities across the south and south east are still in deep mourning following the death of Prince Philip, the Queen’s consort and husband of over 70 years.   For decades, towns and villages across the home counties have revered the Duke of Edinburgh as a god-like spiritual figure and have now come together to pay their respects.

‘The connection between the people of Bognor and Littlehampton and the Duke of Edinburgh goes back a very long time’, said tribal leader Felicity Hudson-Warne, standing below a full length portrait of the Duke in her vestibule. ‘We send our condolences on this saddest of sad days and pray that his physical being may enter the home of the angel spirits’.

These tribes in the south are readily identified by their distinctive blue rinse hair, ostentatious dwellings, property portfolios, and extensive Royal Doulton dinner services.  The villagers – when they are not visiting their holiday homes in Tuscany – live simple lives. Enter some of their faux black and white timbered dwellings and you could be back in the 1930’s. Time stands still for these tribes, many shun modern technology and get commoners in to do simple tasks like cooking, cleaning and looking after children.

Following a formal period of mourning, the ancestral tribe will meet to honour the Duke in their time honoured way, organising church fetes, gymkhanas, bridge parties and opening their gardens to the public to raise funds to top up Tory HQ finances.

 

 

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Posted: Apr 13th, 2021 by

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