NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

‘Grand Designs’ house constructed entirely out of forgotten Christmas puddings

owners 'couldn't build another thing'In one of the most ambitious self-building projects to date ‘Grand Designs’ presenter Kevin McCloud has revealed the first house to be constructed entirely out of forgotten Christmas puddings.

When Devonshire couple, Tom and Felicity Holmes realised that they could never afford to build their dream house out of traditional materials they were forced to think outside of the box. So, when Felicity discovered 17 years’ worth of unused Christmas puddings in the back of her mother’s kitchen cupboard, she experienced a true ‘Eureka’ moment.

Click here for the full story >

Browse Archives

News In Brief

Pope says last two Popes ‘possibly didn’t happen’

Head of the Catholic Church, Pope Francis, has surprised worshippers by suggesting that the two preceding papalcies – those of Pope John Paul II and Pope Benedict XV – may not have occurred at all.

All your devices have been hacked by Russian bandits

Everything you own has been hacked and all of your personal details stolen and sold to criminals, it has emerged.

Arab-Israeli conflict settled as Netanyahu & Hamas meet for ‘a few cheeky pints’

all it took was a decent manly seshBenjamin Netanyahu and Hamas leader Khaled Mashal last night announced a lasting settlement to the Israeli-Palestine conflict following a night of negotiations over eight pints of Fosters in the Lamb and Flag pub, Walthamstow.

Thousands turn out in Birmingham to see Noam Chomsky switch on Christmas lights

That's what makes him beautiful...Thousands of revellers have turned out in Birmingham city centre to celebrate the switching on of the Christmas lights by anarcho-syndicalist activist Noam Chomsky.

Chomsky, who wooed crowds at a similar event in London earlier this month, delivered a speech on revolutionary industrial unionism to rapturous acclaim before flicking the switch to herald the start of the city’s festive celebrations.

Disaffected UK extremists ‘may not be allowed to re-join the Conservative Party’

...won't be allowed abroad either, not that they would ever want to leave UKThe Prime Minister today announced a new raft of measures designed to combat the threat of Britons joining the shadowy extremist group UKIP, including removing the right of those individuals to later return to the Conservative Party.

Derbyshire man devises fellatio voucher scheme after breastfeeding initiative

Gary Prendergast, a 32 year old Derbyshire man, has successfully introduced a fellatio voucher scheme into his marriage.

Miliband to acquire white van and visible bumcrack

‘As it goes I favour the Transit, long wheelbase. It’s a classic innit. None of your foreign shite, Renault or whatever, as driven by some Latvian with a PHd in Economics, a thriving decorating business in Chigwell and a brother on benefits and probably out grooming or dogging most nights. Send ‘em back where they belong, is what I say, subject to the Human Rights Act and existing EU Legislation and the employment needs of a newly recovering economy.’

Men relish denouncing 1970s sexism while still repeatedly saying ‘tits’

Deep, meaningful, respectful, thoughtful, pert observation somewhere round hereShocking revelations about how senior figures from the world of entertainment got away with sexual harassment, combined with an unlimited appetite for instant nostalgia among those who grew up with Spangles and Raleigh Choppers, are creating an ideal situation for middle-aged men. For those who get paid to pass sardonic comment on long-forgotten sitcoms where ‘dirty old men’ leered at ‘dolly birds’, it is better still.

Click here for the full story >